here I am! getting older and trying to get wiser! LOL I am 54. last period, December 2008. symptoms, more than 38 for sure, started 6 months later! went on Cymbalta, was doing great on it, no more tingling, no more muscle tension, no more anxiety out of no where. But too good to continue. After a year, I had gained 40lbs, BP was up, too much up and peteichia on lower limbs and arms.
I stopped. it was 6 months ago! Anxiety is raging, bp is down, weight is coming off but I cannot cope with daily challenges of my symptoms. My tingling is back, my twitching also, muscle tension is worse!! chiroprator does not work!
I worry everyday about everything that is happening in my body. I have aches and pains that comes and goes (abdomen, neck, lower back, arms, ankles, knees, right leg). Joint pain is gone for now. tingling in brain, like goosebumps, feet and hands. shoulder blades aches, twitches in calf and back!! and left side is pretty much always tight.
But I keep coming here as it is the only place right now that will understand me and help me through this storm. Whenever things seems to be quiet, that's when there is something that pops up to remind me that I am in the eye of the storm, not out of it.
And then, there is tomorrow, and tomorrow bring me closer to the light at the end of the tunnel, because, there is always a light at the end of the tunnel, just keep looking straight ahead, it is there.
Today : July 2011
6 months later : changed chiropractor : have been given easy exercises to help with muscle tension in neck and shoulder and it works!! I am feeling better. For the past 5 weeks, I have been on AD again. this time, cipralex : no side effect and smooth transition. I keep eating healthy and my weight keeps coming down slowly. It is a challenging process but a good one. A reminder that menopause is time to pause and take it easy and to pamper ourselves to be able to transition to that calmess and quietness that we deserve. I keep taking my magnesium glycinate and my complex B and my fish oil and my taurine. I am sleeping better. The anxiety is still here but I am now embracing it as a sign that I am vulnerable but it is ok. I am still ocd about diseases but that's who I am. I am learning through CBT how to control my ocd feelings.??I know I will get stronger out of it. It is true that life is a journey and with the bumpy ride there is also the smooth rides. It is just about learning to have the right control on it and to know that you can make it through. We all can. We need to have faith and passion and compassion.
Menopause is just the last metamorphosis that we need to go through to really free ourselves from our old shell and turn into a beautiful butterfly. this is what I want to believe.